If I were the last person on earth farting contests would be less fun. Maybe no fun at all, and would I always win or always lose, and how about ties? Or would it even matter?
If I were the last person on earth how long would there be sardines, assuming that I cared?
If I were the last person on earth I could try being a slime mold without worrying about how I smelled.
If I were the last person on earth maybe I still couldn't get a date. In fact, I believe I would still be out of luck. (My life in a nutshell.)
If I were the last person on earth would fart jokes still be funny? Which ones, for example, and am I being too fussy?
If I were the last person on earth would my driver's license still expire? How about my birthdate? My finger prints? And how about if I forget to trim my nose hairs? Any downsides to that any more?
If I were the last person on earth, I bet I'd still get parking tickets, maybe, even if I was required to issue them to myself, but if so, I could also wear that nifty uniform, so maybe it would be a win after all.
If I were the last person on earth, then I could toot my tooter with no apprehensions about being stopped by the tootie police, or anybody. Very cool.
Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff@gmail.com
Me? Still trying to come in first, as long as I can do it after my nap.
