Found a Leaf in my soup. It is apparently rewards day here at the eatery, and I won the electric car. Want to help me lick off the minestrone?
Woman in car. Snakes for teeth. Doesn't look like my type. Still - that smile.
Went out to drive to work, when I observed my car to be entirely filled with hamsters. No probs - I'm retired now and need some amusement.
Scooter got drunk last night and raised hell all over town. Had to drag him home behind the car. Never let your rat near booze.
Cats never go flat. Unless a car is involved. They're poor drivers too.
A hamster followed me home. I think. How big are they? It ripped open the neighbor's car to get a Snickers bar. May keep him.
Saw Dad running down the street, chasing cars. He thinks he's a dog, but he's actually dead, OK? #AmusingMomentsOfTheDeceased
I bought a car yesterday. It's got two wheels up front. Don't know about the back. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, as Mom always said. I don't never fix nothin anyways.
Crocodile ate my car. Happens every Thursday, about 1 p.m., right in this here parking lot.
