Imaginary Animals, Eh?
* Me. I'm completely synthetic, can be consumed by any vegan, anywhere, at any time, if they don't mind being punched in the face for being the kind of people they are.
* Ruffelosaurus. Eats only potato chips. Farts a lot. Lives only long enough to become annoying.
* Great Horny Flappy Thing. Completely naked in anticipation of events that none of us even want to think could be hypothetically possible.
* Southern Jazz Tromboleus. Loud. Indiscriminately scatters large droppings wherever it goes. Thinks that the Music Age ended with Glenn Miller. Could be right. Who are we to judge? Watch your step. (They're the squishy ones.)
* Radio Frequency Jam and Jelly Fish. Comes with a freshwater tuner.
* Silva Mind Control Chia Pest. Floats like a buzzerfly, stinks like a dung beetle. Sings, but not in tune. Tastes bad, unless you like dung. (Not my favorite.)
* Return of the King Toad Sucker. Well folks, if you've got a toad stuck in your toilet, jamming up the works and preventing smooth moves, then you need a toad sucker, and these are the best. Not safe to use around small children, or if you wander around the house with your pants off (guys). Other than that, pretty mellow. (Does however make a giant sucking sound.)
* Strawberries-and-Cream Mother of God Plush Sleeping Lizard. Your snacking and nap-time pal.
Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff+snorp@gmail.com
Me? Also a nightmare. (Licensed and certified!)
Etc...
so says eff: sporadic spurts of grade eff distraction
definitions: outdoor terms
fiyh: dave's little guide to ultralight backpacking stoves
boyb: dave's little guide to backpacks
snorpy bits: nibbling away at your sanity
last seen receding: missives from a certain mobile homer
noseyjoe: purposefully poking my proboscis into technicals
