I can't really say how others handle this, but my love, Echinoia Eeeps, unlike monarchs, who rely on food tasters to avoid unpleasant, unplanned-for death events, has a bathwater taster (me). True, I did at first decline the honor until she gave me a good pounding, which led me to the conclusion that maybe I'd better go along with the deal in an attempt to avoid bruises and scabs, not to mention lonely nights spent in the family dungeon below the weasel pen. So far, it's working out. (I'm required to say that. )
I got invited to attend my love, Echinoia Eeeps' family's annual Dismemberment and Ritual Devouring of the Easter Bunnies Family Fun Weekend. Tremendous honor. These days they limit the carnage to chocolate bunnies, but force the live ones to watch, as a warning to stay between the lines, etc. And also, as a special treat, I get to wear the finest of the family's fur bunny suits, though they had to promise not to eat me, or even incinerate me. Maybe next year, they said. My own family was never this interesting. Not at all.
If I ever want to bake cookies for my love, Echinoia Eeeps, it will need to be soon. She's going to take away my Precious Little Princess Kitchen Slave Oven Set and sell it to buy drugs (just to see if they're actually fun). Anyhow, that will leave me with my last seven tons of chocolate chips and nowhere to put them, which might see me get too far into the Awkward Zone. (She has one of those, and it hurts.)
My love, Echinoia Eeeps baked a pastel passel of solar apple pies, but the sun wasn't hot enough and all she got was warm mush, which she decided to feed to her goat, Frederick the Baaad, after giving me the honor of first taste, or else, to protect his honor. (I don't know either, and am afraid to ask.)
My love, Echinoia Eeeps bought a grenade launcher, slightly used. She's converted it to launch squirrels, in case we ever find ourselves under attack by nuts. Yet one more reason to both love and fear her.
My love, Echinoia Eeeps said that I'd look pretty good in a bunny suit, especially as she pulled me out of the oven, fully roasted, no less. That's something to think about, yes.
Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff@gmail.com
Me? Did someone say nuts? I'm not allowed to say that here, so quit it right now.
Etc...
so says eff: sporadic spurts of grade eff distraction
definitions: outdoor terms
fiyh: dave's little guide to ultralight backpacking stoves
boyb: dave's little guide to backpacks
snorpy bits: nibbling away at your sanity
last seen receding: missives from a certain mobile homer
noseyjoe: purposefully poking my proboscis into technicals
