Dad was appointed to fill an empty Senate seat for the state of Georgia. Lucky him — the term has five years and eleven months to go, so he's got job security. He's also been dead for 11 years, so his conservative credentials are impeccable. (Can't be peckered, by any pecker.) The only iffy part might be his habit of climbing out of his box and running naked through the streets. He's been doing that since the last shovelful of dirt hit his grave, which the cemetery caretaker and two dogs can attest to. Nobody can figure out how he gets out of the hole, with half a ton of dirt on top, but there you are. This is mostly why I moved to Australia. When you die here, that's it — no funny business. And the dead are officially barred from holding political office.
Well, it's been a tough week for Dad. Despite him showing enough initiative to keep climbing out of his grave to run around naked, and despite setting up his own political campaign ("Dead Prez 24"). It looks pretty certain that the other old dead white guys have him outnumbered this time around.
If monkeys were randomly appointed to every political office and position of power, we'd realize that they actually have been filling those positions for centuries now, and that maybe the best thing you can do is to wear a monkey costume, keep your head down, save all you can, and quietly slip away as soon as you are able manage it. And possibly steal just one more extra bag of monkey nibbles.
Meanwhile, political candidate Doorknob Stumpf is proclaiming that a few thousand helpless people so desperate to survive that they left their homes to walk thousands of miles are going to do us in. Faced with such determination, ingenuity, and sheer grit, I hope so. We need people like that.
Meanwhile, a current office holder by the name of Slo-Mo Joe Binding is practicing walking across a stage without falling down more than once. Way to go, Mo Joe. Now resign.
Have anything worth adding? Then try sosayseff@gmail.com
Me? Just tried a bowl of "Uncle Bob's Monkee Munch". Pretty good overall, considering that I'm an ape.
Etc...
so says eff: sporadic spurts of grade eff distraction
definitions: outdoor terms
fiyh: dave's little guide to ultralight backpacking stoves
boyb: dave's little guide to backpacks
snorpy bits: nibbling away at your sanity
last seen receding: missives from a certain mobile homer
noseyjoe: purposefully poking my proboscis into technicals
