Captain Bushy Nose Hairs is back. From where? No one seems to care. This is not news to anyone who lives around here.
Captain Endless Prancing is auditioning yet again for acceptance into the Maude Stomper School of Ballet and Square Dance Moves. She turns 63 next week, and is still ornery as hell, so let's wish her success this time around, because the alternative is too predictable to be acceptable. And what's-his-name? How about him? Meh.
Captain Explosive Diarrhea is still locked out of the clubhouse, additional guards have been posted, and larger-caliber firearms acquired, since we prefer not to receive our share of what he's got on offer.
Captain Fuzzy Thinking is still trying to understand the question. It has been only a year since it was put to him, and no one seems to be in a hurry for an answer, if there is one, so we'll just wait it out then. Sounds good. Plenty of time for another beer.
Captain Growly Barker says "hi". As opposed to "lo", though both work, I guess. No, really — either one works, but he likes to mix it up sometimes. Maybe that's why he does wear a bikini to work, on occasion, which is also a chance to show off his martial arts tattoo collection, which he carries around on his chest, though you do have to pay extra to peek under the bikini top.
Captain Inscrutable Mumbling is off on a tangent again. It is suspected. Though, since no one can understand anything that comes out of his orifice, it's only a guess.
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Me? I'm not like that, really.
