- My love, Echinoia Eeeps, has a new hobby, singeing cotton balls while guzzling wine — singe binges. I'm so sweet on her forever.
- My love, Echinoia Eeeps, has taken up hunting. She uses a crossbow and stalks dust bunnies by candlelight. We roasted one last night for her birthday.
- My love, Echinoia Eeeps, had an extensive housefly collection until one of her cousins ate it to get a buzz.
- My love, Echinoia Eeeps, wanted fried fish but never caught any so she pounded me. Now it's a tradition, I guess. Got fish, send me some, I'm getting mushy.
- Whenever I think of farm tractors, I think of my love, Echinoia Eeeps. I don't know why. Maybe it's the low-end torque. Maybe the hefty lugs, or the paint job, but something. Whatever it is, it's magical.
- My love, Echinoia Eeeps, has taken up welding. "More productive than knitting," she says. Now I have a nice armored cage to sleep in.
- My love, Echinoia Eeeps, requested a sand castle of me, which I recently finished. "Too small," she said. "I want a real one." So I had to enroll in architecture school. After the bruises healed. (She has fists of iron, my love does.)
- My love, Echinoia Eeeps, made me turtle soup, or would have if she'd managed to catch me, even though she keeps insisting that I will no doubt taste more like rat.